Deeper Dialogues

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What to say

Money

Chasing a client who hasn't paid

The work is done, the invoice is overdue, and it's a client you'd like to keep. You don't want to sound desperate or like a debt collector, but you have bills of your own.

What they need from you, and why

Plenty of late payments have nothing to do with disrespect or financial distress. Invoices get lost, sit in the wrong inbox, wait for someone's sign-off, or are simply forgotten, and some clients are just disorganised or unclear about how to pay you. Think of your own experience as a customer: a respectful, human reminder makes you want to sort it out quickly, while a curt, impersonal demand makes something in you resist, even when you know you owe the money.

What the client needs is an easy, face-saving way to pay: a friendly first touch that assumes an admin oversight, a specific question to answer, a date they name themselves, and an opening to be honest if cash is tight. A money problem on its own rarely costs you a good client; the damage comes from the conversation nobody has, or from a first reminder that reads like a legal threat.

The Business & Professional Money Relationships add-on draws on Robert Cialdini's work on commitment: once people have committed to something in their own words they tend to act in line with it, and in a UK health-service trial (Martin, Bassi and Dunbar-Rees, 2012), patients who wrote their next appointment on the card themselves missed 18% fewer appointments. Its COLLECT framework turns that into practice: raise a delay early, listen for what's behind it, and escalate gradually, from a gentle reminder around a week overdue to a final notice at five or six weeks. Late-payment rules differ between countries, so check with an accountant or lawyer before relying on fees or interest.

Understand it properly

First

Rule out the simple explanations first: make sure the invoice reached the right person with everything they need to process it.

You could say

  • Hi [name], I hope the project's working well for you. I wanted to check in about last month's invoice. Is there anything you need from me to process it?

    It frames you as helpful rather than demanding, and gives them a face-saving reason for the delay.

  • The invoice for [project] was due on the 1st. Could you let me know when I can expect payment?

    Clear, warm and specific, so there's something concrete to answer.

  • Can I expect payment by the 15th?

    A date the client confirms in their own words is more likely to stick than a generic reminder.

  • If anything about the work isn't right, I'd like to fix it.

    A payment delay sometimes points to unhappiness with the work; asking opens that door before it festers.

  • If cash flow's tight, I'd rather we talk about it openly. What schedule could you realistically commit to?

    It opens the conversation without accusation and sets a clear expectation of openness, without you becoming their lender.

If it goes badly

Three ways this can turn. Read the one that happens; the others can wait.

You've said something like

Hi [name], I hope the project's working well for you. I wanted to check in about last month's invoice. Is there anything you need from me to process it?

  • If they go quiet after your reminder

    I haven't heard back about the invoice for [project]. If it's got lost in the shuffle I'm happy to resend it, and if there's a question about the work I'd like to hear it.

    It gives them face-saving options and assumes good intent, while keeping the question live.

  • If they say the extra work should have been included

    The original agreement covered [X and Y], which we delivered. The extra pieces sat outside that, which is why they were quoted separately. Happy to walk you through them.

    It holds the boundary while owning any gap in what was explained, and moves the focus to the value of the extra work.

  • If they keep promising "next week"

    I've had a few next weeks now, so I need a firm date. If it's not paid by [date], I'll have to pause work on [current project].

    A few weeks in, a clear consequence and a timeline, stated professionally, show you take your terms seriously without assuming bad faith.

Share these words

Send them to yourself, or to someone helping you.

Try not to say

  • "Totally no rush, whenever suits! Sorry to bother you!"

    They'll read "no rush" as no rush, and pay three weeks late.

  • "Pay immediately or I'll take further action." (as a first reminder)

    Opening with a threat assumes bad faith and costs you referrals; step up the firmness gradually.

  • Saying nothing and quietly seething

    The damage usually comes from the conversation nobody has, not from one late invoice.

  • A reminder with no date and no question in it

    Give them something specific to answer, or nothing happens.

Afterwards

Note the date and what they said, and diarise the next step: a friendly reminder about a week overdue, a more direct follow-up at two weeks, a firm one with a date and a consequence at three to four weeks, and a final notice after that. Put anything agreed, a payment date or a schedule, in a short email the same day so you both have it. Once it's paid, don't go back over the delay; a quick thanks treats payment as customer care rather than debt collection. Before the next job, walk them through how invoicing works and who approves it, and consider milestone invoicing so a problem shows up before you've delivered everything. Late fees and interest work differently in each country, so check with an accountant or lawyer where you work before relying on them, and if a client disregards payment agreements again and again, protecting your business may mean letting them go.

Understand it properly

The words above come from these. A section is about ten minutes; the whole module is there when you have longer.

Where this comes from
  • Deeper Dialogues, Business & Professional Money Relationships: the COLLECT framework, "The Professional First Touch", the apology invoice and the confident check-in, payment scenarios, the escalation ladder, preventing payment problems, Cialdini and Martin, Bassi and Dunbar-Rees (2012), late-payment rules by country

We gather and pass on what researchers and support organisations have found. This isn't a replacement for a doctor, counsellor or support service.